It’s been too long since I’ve written a blog post.
After working part time for fifteen years, I am now working full time. I’m still with D+H (Formerly Harland Financial Solutions) and I enjoy the challenge.
Working full time, being a grandma to two beautiful grandchildren, and occasionally traveling with our son Gabe has limited my spare time. What little time I have has been dedicated to drafting my first novel.
I’m excited to apply the writing lessons I’ve learned in online classes, retreats and conferences as I craft this first piece of fiction.
The book is tentatively titled – Behind The Smile.
The story is about Kit Stevenson. A supermom who has successfully managed to keep her head above the rising waters of her chaotic life. Kit, like many of us, has hidden her challenges behind her notable smile. But when she is forced to deal with her secrets and her pain, she learns the power of being vulnerable and authentic — something she wished she’d learned years earlier.
Oh how I relate to Kit. Do you?
One year ago on April 14, 2014, I checked myself in to The Center – A Place of Hope desperate to find answers for the discouragement I couldn’t shake.
No one knew. Or so I thought.
I was sure my smile hid the pain so well. I was on top of it, wasn’t I?
You know, the typical work, family, marriage and health issues.
This was no different than anyone else, right?
I soon learned I was kidding myself when a very good friend called me out. We were talking on the phone one afternoon. She mentioned depression and prayed for me to get some help.
About a week later, I found a book in my mailbox – “Turning Your Down into Up” – by Dr. Gregory Jantz.
NOT ME! I said. I’m on top of it. I’ve got everything under control. Don’t you see my smile?
Depression is all about my grandma, and my mom and my sister. Not about me!
My friends and my counselor asked great questions that pointed me to an understanding that my busy life was a coping mechanism. Going a hundred miles an hour in every which direction kept me from dealing with the truth.
When I took an honest look at my life, I admitted I was suffering from depression and anxiety. I was too proud to admit it.
For years I hid my pain behind the smile.
I’d known it for a long time. But I was afraid to be honest with myself and my family and tell the truth.
I am thankful for honest friends and counselors to speak the truth in love and point me to HOPE.
Six weeks of individual and group therapy dealing with the whole body approach to health uncovered a mountain of issues I finally understood. I was challenged to face a few things head on. I learned tools for daily living. I realized my life is worth taking time to heal.
As difficult as it was, I am a better person because of what I learned.
I’d like to come along your side to encourage you in your journey as I share more about mine. Would you like to take this walk with me?
Take the first step — Share in the comments about a time where you hid behind a smile.
Smiling with Truth,
Gigi
I wondered about you today. Are you enjoying these lazy days of summer?
We had a fabulous vacation at a Joni and Friends Family Camp in Murietta, California. We spent time with my California Devine cousins and even took in a day at Disneyland. I’ll post about that over the weekend.
Now I’m feeling called to write again. It is scary.
The past two years have been focused on the book I wrote with my son Gabe. We published it on April 13, 2012. It has been a fun journey of promoting this book and traveling with Gabe as he shares his message of HOPE with thousands of people.
My Message is C.L.E.A.R. – Hope and Strength in the Face of Life’s Greatest Adversities
If you haven’t read it yet, it is available on Gabe’s website at http://GabeMurfitt.com
We’ve traveled to schools and churches where he has shared his courageous story of living in his unusually formed body. He is gearing up for the fall speaking season. If your school district needs a dynamic speaker, contact him for more information.
Now it’s time to have courage to begin again.
My next writing project is taking Gabe’s story a step further and creating a character development curriculum.
Next week I will be teaming up with some amazing teachers to chart out the lessons to help young students develop characteristics that include Courage, Leadership, Endurance, Attitude and Respect. These are the five letters in the acronym Gabe uses to tell his story. It is an exciting project!
We’ll start with Courage.
What does courage mean to you? I liked this definition.
What area of your life are you asking for more courage?
I hope you’ll let me know on my website (in the comments section below) so I can pray for you.
Let’s have a courageous week – seeking the courage to do the things we are called to do. The courage to start or to begin AGAIN…
Bless your courageous heart,
Gigi
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I pray you are having a warm and sunny season filled with hope and love. I have been thoroughly enjoying our warm weather here in the Northwest. And I feel deeply loved with new hope in my heart.
I’ve been away from my blog for a bit. I have fresh writing ideas every day but I just haven’t made it a priority to record them here. There are many reasons why but that doesn’t matter.
I know now that I am to write here again. I also know I am to finish another book.
I want to start some courageous conversations. Many things we discuss will be from the book I’ve been working on for the last ten years. Stories of HOPE from the journals of my life. Will you join in and share your story?
I’ve been doing much work on learning to be a better wife, mother, grandmother and friend.
A whole hearted Gigi. 
Not the Gigi who wears a smile when she is actually deeply sad. (Take off the mask, Gigi)
Not the Gigi who fears to be honest because I want you to like me. (You are enough, Gigi)
Not the Gigi who lives with shame and guilt. (God loves you always, Gigi)
In my research and study, I’ve devoured many books, spent hours in counseling and listened to more teaching CD’s than I can count. I could probably wallpaper my living room with the jackets of the CD’s I’ve heard.
Now it’s time to share what I’ve learned.
It is my hope that in sharing, I will grab your hand and take you along this journey with me to whole hearted living.
Recently I read three books written by Dr. Brene Brown. 
I’ve also listened to several of her audio CD’s and watched her TED Talks. If you don’t know her work, please check it out. It has been life changing for me.
In the next several months, I want to start some courageous conversations about all that I’ve come to know in the last several years.
I pray you will join in this courageous conversation. And together we can live the life God created us to live for such a time as this. I believe the world is waiting for us to be courageous.
So let’s have a courageous conversation.
Bless your courageous heart,
Gigi